Birthday Post #5 ~ Be Weird

Hiya dudes! Birthday post #5 today!

Today's lesson is to be weird. 

I do mean that, too. Be weird. Don't fit in.

So many people spend their energy just to fit in. To check off the boxes. To blend in.

I'll admit - I used to be like that. I tried desperately to fit in. To blend in. To not let anyone notice me. I used to hide behind conformity, and hated anything that made me stand out. I genuinely loathed attention - it made me uncomfortable, angry, and deep down, afraid.

I vividly remember thinking to myself on multiple occasions how much I wanted to blend in. I used to argue with God about it, and insist I was better off blending in. He never agreed. More than a decade later, I understand what He meant.

Don't get me wrong, I'm still learning this lesson - I just understand why now. I'm having to undo years of trapping myself in box upon box, hiding myself away, for no good reason. The "reasons" I had for hiding aren't actually reasons - it all comes down to fear, and I took a stand against fear several years ago. That means I get to be bold, weird, eccentric, and love every single second of it.

God doesn't make people with a cookie cutter. We aren't meant to blend in. Even flowers of the same species all look different, and flowers in general are all wildly different. If they were all exactly the same, the world would be pretty boring. You could say those exact two sentences about literally anything, just replace "flower" and there you go. Including people.

You're a person. You weren't made to conform. You were made to be unique. 

Be true to yourself, and ignore the checklists. If you want to be a clean-cut business savvy career person, do it! If you want to be a musician hippie living in a travel van with three other people who don't shower too much but love every minute of it, then do it! If you want to dye your hair green, do it! If you want to wear a suit every day, go get that suit and wear it with pride!

There is no wrong way to be weird - just be you. As long as you're not hurting anyone else, there's no wrong way to human. Life is short, messy, and wild. Be you, whoever that is. 

"Weird" isn't a bad thing - it just means you don't fit the mold. I say, good. Don't fit that mold. Screw the mold. People don't grow by sticking to the mold - they just end up average and boring.

So, lesson #5: Be Weird.

Birthday Post #4 ~ Have A Pet

Hiya dudes! Birthday post #4 today!

This one is about the lesson of having a pet.

This one may seem a little odd, but I've found it's really important. Pets add something completely unique to your life. They are different than kids, friends, or family. They are in a category all their own, and that's an important place in your life to fill.

Different kinds of pets provide different things, obviously. Dogs, cats, snakes, turtles, fish, guinea pigs, horses - they're all unique, and not every animal is for just anyone. We all need to find the pet that suits us, and it will probably change during different times in your life.

Still, having a pet is important. It requires you to take care of something other than yourself, without being as massive as raising a kid. Children leave a much larger footprint than a pet, and are a whole different kind of animal, if you will. Pets allow us to love something completely personal, without there being massive consequences, and for most pets, don't have a life-long commitment. 

A lot of people recommend getting pets for kids, once they're old enough, to teach them responsibility and give them a companion that's all theirs. It helps develop many parts of their little brains and hearts, and is important. I don't think that importance expires with age.

Adults need the same thing, and sometimes, even more than kids, because your family isn't always there for you once you're on your own. 

I recommend everyone have a pet, at least once, and for the most part, to always  have at least one pet. They give you so much, and it's pretty awesome to have that in your life.

Pets may not be your thing, but really, there aren't many people who wouldn't enjoy some sort of pet. Even a fish can make you laugh and give you something to care for. 

So, lesson #4: have a pet. 

Birthday Post #3 ~ Never Stop Dancing

Hiya dudes! Back today with day 3 of 28 life lessons I've learned so far!

Today, is to dance.

Dancing is definitely one of the only things that's kept me going through my life. When I feel so down I just want it all to end, I dance, and it gives me life. I have yet to meet someone where truly letting go and just dancing and having fun hasn't brightened their spirit.

There's something pure and honest about dancing, letting go of yourself, even if it's only for a minute, and just having fun. I love to dance, and it's literally saved my life a time or two. 

When you have a frown you just can't turn upside down, try dancing. Nothing fancy, nothing serious, just put on a song you can't help but tap your foot to, close your eyes, and just dance like you did when you were a little kid. I'm sure it'll put a smile on your face, and make you feel better.

So, lesson 3 - dance. Never stop dancing.

Birthday Post #2 ~ Chill Pill

Hiya dudes! Back with day 2 of 28 posts for my birthday month! 

Today, I'm going to talk about the lesson of the chill pill.

If you've never heard of a chill pill, heard the phrase "take a chill pill" or something similar, well, where have you been? 

In all seriousness though, it's a good lesson. I remind myself quite often to take a chill pill, and it really does help. It was a phrase used often in my parent's home when I was growing up, and it's carried with me into my adult life.

I think I mastered this lesson at a fairly young age, for the most part. Taking a chill pill is basically just that, you calm the F down, and chill out. It's a way of mentally and emotionally taking back the reigns of the current situation you find yourself in, generally to calm down. 

For example, as a woman, I have monthly PMS cycles that cause my body to have hormone spikes. I get moody, irritable, and lose patience for no good reason. When this starts up, I will actually tell myself, out loud, to take a chill pill. Inside, basically, I take a deep breath, let go of any negative emotion I'm holding onto, and relax. I stretch my neck out, and let go of the tension that always seems to be there, and let it go. 

I take a chill pill.

I've never had a situation where doing this has made things worse. In fact, every time I've ignored the need to take a chill pill, things have gotten far worse, every time. High emotions and irritability are never helpful, and a clear mind will always handle a situation better than one being fueled by frustration or negativity. Believe me, it's not always easy. Sometimes you do need to blow off steam and vent, but when dealing with other people, or once you've blown off that steam, it's time for a chill pill.

I have to say, the chill pill has definitely been one of the most important life lessons I've learned, and it's one I'll cling to til my grave. I hope it's one you'll adopt as well - trust me, it'll always help. If you find yourself in a situation where you're just snapping at everything, upset at little things, getting in fights, nagging or bickering with people, or getting irritated with things you can't change, that's your cue to take that chill pill.

Breathe, relax, let go of the negativity, and swallow that chill pill, man. You'll find a massive weight lift off your shoulders if you actually internalize the chill pill, and things will always improve. I promise.

So, lesson 2: take a chill pill, man.

Birthday Post #1 ~ Self Love & You're Important

Hiya dudes! Okay, starting off the 28 days of posts for my b-day!

I'm not going to do this in any particular order, just 28 things that I've learned, that I think others could learn from.

I want to start with the lesson of loving yourself, and respecting your importance.

It took me a looooong time to learn this, and honestly, I'm still learning it. This project I'm doing right now, posting for the whole month, is an exercise in that lesson. It isn't wrong to acknowledge your importance, it's simply good to keep it in check, and not get too full of yourself. If I was doing a month of posts all about why I'm awesome-sauce, then maybe there would be an ego issue, and some vanity to address.

See, that's the root there, I think, of the fear a lot of people have of thinking they're important enough to acknowledge, love, or respect. So many people I've talked to who struggle with self confidence, seem to have a fear of people thinking they're vain, and full of themselves in an unhealthy way. Learning the difference between vanity and healthy confidence is key, and hopefully this post will help.

See, this project is a good example. I'm not asking you to pay attention to me. Yes, I'm sharing things I've learned, but the point is to help other people (hopefully), and remind myself how much I've grown up so far. I can acknowledge that I have something to offer people, and celebrate my life, without being obnoxious. At least, I hope.

It seems like self-love is something that's a bit twisted in today's world, where kids are taught to either ignore themselves completely, which generally leads to a rebellion later on in life, or they're taught to love themselves too much, to the point of excluding others in their life. I'm more interested in helping people who don't feel important, and don't feel worth loving.

I can tell you, without a doubt, you are. It's a big life lesson to learn, and everyone struggles with it in one way or another. You were made, beyond all reason. Of all the pairings of dna your parents could have made, you were created. That's amazing. You, by simply existing, are a miracle. You matter. It's important to value yourself, and love yourself, so you can grow, and live life to the fullest.

Like I said, I'm still learning this, so I'm definitely not a great example yet, but I hope to be one day. If I can inspire one person to look in the mirror and smile at the person looking back at them, I will be happy.

So, lesson 1: love yourself, because you DO matter. Respect your existence, because you're important. 

Birthday Month!

Hiya dudes! Guess what, April is my birthday month!

Yes, I am one of those obnoxious people that  has fun the entire month, instead of one day. Why limit it? I hate restricting the celebration of something to one day - it puts a ton of pressure on it to be something awesome, and just ends up making people not care after a while. At least, it does for me.

I celebrate the New Year all of January, 

love and Valentine's Day all of February, 

St. Patrick's Day/Irish Day all of March, 

my anniversary all of May, 

hub's bday all of June, 

Independence Day/being American all of July, 

Fall/Autumn all of September, 

Halloween all of October, 

Thanksgiving all of November, 

and Christmas all of December (okay, I start celebrating that one in September - don't judge me.). 

Why should my bday be any different? It's important to my family, and it's fun.

So, April is my month, to spend time on me, because honestly, the rest of the year, I kind of forget about me. I take care of everyone else, all my projects, my jobs, and forget about myself. April gives me a chance to get my personal life in order every year, get my spirit balanced and healthy, and refocus my priorities and my energy.

Since I'm focusing on this blog more now, I'm going to do a daily (hopefully) post, and at least weekly post, about things that I've learned so far in my life. My birthday is on the 28th, and I'll be 28 - keeping in line with the theme, I'll list 28 things I've learned.

Hopefully you guys find it interesting, and if not, check back in May for some other topics of interest.

Bring on birthday month!!